FAQ about "Our Corner of the Web"
Version 1.4 (updated sometime in the year 2002)

 

We get questions...lots of questions...via email and our guestbook. Some questions get asked more frequently than others. Thus, we have compiled this "FAQ" or "Frequently Asked Questions..."

Contents

 

Who are you?

As it states in the "fine print" at the bottom of our home page:

We're a family that has been blessed with six living children. Perusing this web site will give you a good indication of a number of our interests and ideas, as well as our theological bent. While our "Family Issues Page", especially its somewhat controversial elements, has taken up more of our time and seems to be generating the most hits by far, we're not "one issue" people. Really. So, come on, visit the rest of our site too!

 
Where are you coming from theologically?
Hopefully the updated Theological Issues Page will give a better indication of our theological bent. We aren't into labels, having found that those who wish to attach theological labels to others often do so in an attempt to dismiss anything the other person might say. ("Well, what do you expect? He's a fundamentalist." "I should have known. Can anything good come out of the Baptist church?" "It figures. Those Reformed people..." etc.) For those who simply cannot function without labels and denominationalism, here's a few various members of our family have worn, are wearing, or might wear in the future:
  • Christian
  • saved by grace
  • redeemed by the blood of the Lamb
  • grew up as a PK (that's Preacher's Kid, not Promise Keeper)
  • grew up in an unchurched family
  • evangelical
  • Baptist
  • Calvinist? Arminian? I'm not sure.
  • 4-point Calvinist
  • 5-point Calvinist
  • wishy-washy 3.5 point Calvinist
  • closet Calvinist who likes to argue the Arminian position
  • pseudo-Calvinist
  • classical premillenialist
  • not-quite-postmillenialist, but reading on the issue
  • panmillenialist (whenever or however the millennium comes, everything will pan out in the end)
  • nondenominational
  • Biblical literalist
  • semi-Reformed
  • more-than-semi-Reformed
  • beyond Reformed
  • semi-Covenantal
  • more-than-semi-Covenantal
  • New Covenantal...sort of
  • sympathetic to paedobaptism
  • still clinging to Believer's Baptism by immersion only
  • practicing Paedobaptists but still very sympathetic to the Baptist position (i.e., theological fence-straddlers)
  • once again clinging to Believer's Baptism, but not as hardnosed about immersion, although it is our strong preference
  • Orthodox Presbyterian
  • returning to the Baptist fold
  • always reforming
  • standing firm in liberty! (Galations 5:1)
The introduction to "Some Concerns About the Ezzo Method" gives a fairly clear picture of how we interact with Scripture.
Far more important than any label is the fact that we believe in the inerrancy, infallibility, and sufficiency of Scripture. We are basing our lives, and the lives of our family members, on the Truths contained in Scripture. We believe in the sovereignty and majesty of God, in His holiness, justice, mercy, grace, and love. We have been unworthy recipients of that grace and love, and we pray that our children, our loved ones, and every visitor to our web pages might experience the miracle of God's grace and love in their lives.
 
Help! I can't access the PDF files!
Some of our articles on the Family Issues Page are in Adobe Acrobat format and require the Adobe Acrobat Reader, which is available free from Adobe.
(Just so there is not any confusion, PDF in this context refers to Portable Document Format, not Parent-Directed Feeding.)
 
But I don't have room on my hard disk for one more program. Couldn't you send me the articles in text format (or in Word for Windows...or in WordStar...or in...)?
Up until now, these articles have only been available in Acrobat format. I simply don't have the time to translate them into any other reasonable format, as this would strip out footnotes, etc. However, someday (yes, I know I've been promising this for a loooooong time) I hope to have more of the articles available as regular old web pages. Eventually, God willing and as time permits, they will all be available on the Web in both formats. Maybe some day. Who knows?
 
 
Why do you feel the need to downplay the Ezzos?
Certainly, as our no longer operational guestbook illustrates, many families feel they have benefited from the Ezzos' parenting programs. However, as our guestbook also illustrates, others have grave concerns. These concerns are not welcome on the GFI site, nor are they welcome in most of the GFI classes. Many parents are troubled by what they have experienced in their own families, what they have seen in their churches, and what they have read in the materials or been taught in the classes. It is a valuable and necessary thing to examine any teaching in light of Scripture. It is important to try to see the big picture. Many parents have expressed to me that my materials--and the other materials available on or from my pages--have helped them to make a more informed decision about whether the Ezzo Method is right for their family. These materials are on my web pages because they have been requested repeatedly from me; frankly, I no longer have the time to send out packets of info via snail mail and email. This method of "delivery" is far more efficient.
 
You really shouldn't judge the Ezzos.
Although this isn't a question, I will respond. I can understand this concern. I have attempted to stay clear of judging the Ezzos' hearts and motives. My intent has to been to be like the Bereans, who were commended in Scripture for diligently examining the apostle's teaching in light of Scripture. Obviously this is not being judgmental or the Bereans would have been condemned rather than described as "noble". We are called to hold teachers up to a high standard, to investigate their teaching carefully, to put it to the test of Scripture, and to examine the fruit of that teaching.
 
You shouldn't say anything about the Ezzos until you have raised at least one of your children successfully by their methods. Until then, you don't know what you're talking about.
This was not the response of the apostles to the Bereans. They didn't insist that the Bereans keep their mouths shut until they had carefully followed the apostles' teaching successfully. In fact, it would seem foolish to practice discernment in this manner. "Hhhmmm....I wonder how Scriptural this teaching is. Think I'll apply it in my life for years so that I'll be able to figure out if it's a sound teaching or not."
Furthermore, I am not so concerned about whether the method "works". Having my baby sleep through the night and eat on a schedule the Ezzos deem appropriate is not my foremost goal as a mother. Experience has taught me, after six babies, that this is no big deal. Eventually all babies sleep through the night and settle into a comfortable routine. It's not really an issue in our family. My concerns are: Is this method everything it purports to be? Is it, in fact, God's Way? Is it truly based on Biblical principles? Will it teach me to be more Christ-like in the way I treat my babies and children? Are there other methods of childrearing that are perhaps more Biblical and more in keeping with my husband's and my goals for our family? Is the medical information contained in the Ezzos' materials accurate? Are there pitfalls and potential problems that might make me cautious about implementing this method? Are the teachers people that I would wish to emulate--do I, when fully trained by them, wish to become like them? Are they Biblically qualified to teach or have they attempted to take on a role that is not in keeping with Scripture? (e.g.: is a woman attempting to exercise a role of authority that has been forbidden by Scriputre? is a man attempting to usurp the role that Titus 2:3-5 has given to older women?) Should I be concerned about the controversy and divisiveness that this method seems to generate? Should I be concerned about how other people I deeply respect evaluate this method?
I am not willing to experiment on my children, disobey my husband, and violate my own conscience just to gain a hearing among proponents of the Ezzo Method some twenty years down the road. Furthermore, I doubt whether those who have made this statement would be willing to hold themselves to the same standard: are they going to withhold comment on any and all parenting methods and philosophies until they have successfully raised at least one of their children by that method or philosophy? If so, all I can say is...this will stifle all meaningful discourse about parenting in general. No one will be able to have enough children in order to "test" each parenting method that is out there! And, even if we did have that many children, all discussion would have to be postponed until the next generation is raised succesfully.
 
Why does your site seemed filled mostly with Ezzo-bashing?
First of all, it is not my intention to bash anyone. Second, I have a growing number of other pages besides the Family Issues Page--and even this page is, in my opinion, hardly an "Ezzo-bashing" page. Third, I have now added, and will continue to add, parenting articles that deal with more general issues. Hopefully these articles will be encouraging to all parents, even if they have absolutely no interest in the GFI controversy.
 
Why the harsh criticism of the Ezzos? Why are you persecuting them? Why do you persist in attacking them? Why the cruel comments? Must you be so harsh and ugly?
I have one sincere request to make of the next person who poses such a question: please provide me with examples of my harsh criticism, persecution, attacks, cruel comments, harshness, and ugliness. Please. If you cannot do so, then please do not make such accusations, especially not publicly. If you are concerned about the tone of my articles, I will be more than happy to work on specific areas and I will be more than happy to pass your specific concerns on to the other authors on these pages. For example, I removed one link to an Ezzo "expose" that many found offensive. In this case, people gave me concrete examples of what was offensive to them. I was more than happy to take action.
Actually I have another request. When making such accusations, please do not hide behind the cloak of anonymity. This prevents me from contacting you for specifics...and it causes me to wonder at the validity of your concerns.
Criticism in and of itself is not sinful. The word "critic" comes the Greek word for judge or discerner, meaning one who judges, separates, distinguishes. There is a great need for discernment and proper judgment. However, if I have been harsh in this, please point out specific examples, that I and others might benefit from your rebuke.
Persecution is a strong word, one which I don't care to see used lightly. I am hardly pursuing the Ezzos "in a manner to injure, vex or afflict; to harass with unjust punishment or penalties for supposed offenses; to inflict pain from hatred or malignity; to afflict, harass or destroy for adherence to a particular creed or system of religious principles." If writing about concerns regarding teaching is described as persecution, this belittles the plight of those who are being truly persecuted--those brothers and sisters who are losing jobs and homes for the Faith, who are being beaten and tortured, even murdered. Please, let's not trivialize persecution.
To accuse me and the other authors of articles on this issue of "attacking" the Ezzos, without giving any evidence or reasons for such an accusation, seems unjust indeed. Have you also written to the Ezzos personally and expressed your concerns about the remarks they have made publicly? (See for example, Gary Ezzos' posts on AOL, which offended a number of women, as recorded in "Some Concerns About the Ezzo Method" on the Family Issues Page. See also Roy Maynard's public statement about Gary Ezzos' response to the World Magazine article. See various issues of the Growing Families Journal for misinformation and condemning remarks about Dr. Sears and La Leche League.)
It is truly sad that this controversy has polarized parents within the Christian community. However, attempting to discourage debate or criticism through ungrounded accusations does not solve the problem. If the accusations are, in fact, well grounded, I will be quick to apologize where apology is due.
 
Why don't you include some pro-GFI articles? Don't you feel a responsibility to present both sides of the issue?
I've done something much better than provide a few pro-GFI articles; I've provided a link on my Family Issues Page to the largest collection of exclusively pro-GFI materials on the Internet--the GFI website. And, I've gone one step further. I've graciously allowed my guestbook to be used as a forum for pro-GFI testimonials, even though some visitors to our pages have felt these particular guestbook entries (some of them quite lengthy) would have been more appropriately posted to GFI's guestbook or testimonials page. I have not censored, removed, or edited any guestbook entry. (GFI, by the way, does not have an open guestbook policy. Several people have informed me that their entries have been removed because they expressed disagreement or concern with the GFI materials.)
 
Get real. I bet you've never even read the Ezzos' stuff.
True story: a couple who had formerly taught the "Preparation for Parenting" classes at their church became disillusioned with the results they were seeing in their own family and in the families of their students. As a result, they began studying the materials a bit more critically. During this process, they read an article I had written and they also read a copy of my critique ("Preparation for Behavioral Pediatrics?" available on the Family Issues Page.) Armed with their concerns, they went to their pastor and, in the course of the conversation, mentioned my article and critique. Although this pastor lived in another state and had never met me, he dismissed my critique by saying, "Rebecca Prewett? Well, she admitted to a close friend of hers who teaches GFI classes that she had never even read any of the materials." This surprised the husband. He said something along the lines of, "Well, that's really interesting because, in her critique, Mrs. Prewett quotes extensively from the Ezzos' materials, with accurate documentation and footnotes." Obviously the pastor had been the unfortunate recipient of misinformation; I never made such a false "admission" to anyone, let alone a GFI class facilitator.
 
Why don't you have a critique of the most recent editions of "Preparation for Parenting"? What about all the other Ezzo materials? I heard the Ezzos are coming out with some new series. What do you know about it and when are you going to write something about it?
Whew! It would be a full time job to keep up with all of the GFI materials. God has not called me to abandon my family in this way. Nor do I think it would be wise stewardship of our finances to keep purchasing all the new editions of books, tapes, videos, etc.
Although the third edition of "Prep" has been replaced by two new editions, it is still in use. I get calls and emails about families who are still using the "green book", churches who are still teaching that edition, and parents who are being given it as baby shower gifts. Thus, it is still very much in circulation. Furthermore, the Ezzos have never retracted any of the information it contains. They state that the new editions offer only further clarification and that their principles and philosophy remain the same.
 
Why isn't Gary Ezzo at Grace Community any more? Is GFI a nonprofit organization? Why does the headquarters of GFI keep moving? How much do their materials cost? When are they coming out with the next edition of "Prep"? Where do the Ezzos attend church? Could you ask Gary and Anne Marie why they keep on bashing Dr. Sears and La Leche League? Why is GFI promoting that pro-bottlefeeding book? What are the Ezzos up to these days? How can I find out what churches in our area are offering their classes?
The controversy at Grace is probably best summarized here. I am not a one-person clearinghouse on all things Ezzo, nor would it be appropriate for me to speculate about their motives, plans for the future, or personal lives. These questions are best addressed to GFI or to the Ezzos personally. In addition, a number of articles have been written recently updating the Ezzo/church involvement controversies as well as the problems within the GFI organization.
 
 
Why did you have to plaster all the Macintosh stuff all over your pages? Isn't there enough division within the Christian community without people like you trying to make one computer seem better or more spiritual than another? Frankly, I'm offended at your obvious bias. I noticed that you didn't have any "Windows Goodies" on your page. I bet you've never even used a Windows PC. You should realize that there are a LOT more of us than of you Macintosh people. Besides, Apple is going out of business. Then where will you be?
OK, so no one has actually asked this one. I did receive one little comment about getting a "real computer". I stand behind...or rather sit in front of...my iMac. And rumors of Apple's demise are greatly exaggerated.
 
How can I write a web page? I can't get the Acrobat Reader to work. Why won't the AOL browser let me retrieve the files? How should I configure Netscape?
Sorry, I don't have the time--or the knowledge--to answer these sorts of questions. I've provided some links to info about web pages. The other questions are best addressed to the technical support staff of the companies involved.
 
Help! I'm a single mother and need advice. What should I do about...?
I'm afraid that I'm neither equipped nor called to an online counseling ministry. I pray that the local church will be able to minister to you in this area.
 
Could you add a link to my site?
When I have time, I'll visit your site. We don't have any criteria in place as to what sites we add and what we don't. It's purely subjective. I may add it; I may not. I know that sounds arbitrary and it is. Please don't take it personally if your site isn't added. I may have not yet had the chance to visit your site. I may have visited your site and forgotten to bookmark it. I may just not have gotten around to updating my pages. Or , your site may be terrific but not seem to "fit" our page. I'm just one person, married to a net-phobic husband, and I don't have as much time to spend on this "hobby" as I'd like...
 
Can I link to your site?
Sure--and thanks for asking. I would hope, at least, that you would introduce my pages in a positive way, rather than, "Here's a link to an absolutely ridiculous set of pages. You'll get a hoot out of this. This woman is some sort of wacko, keeps having so many babies that she's obviously lost whatever sense God gave her..."
 

Why doesn't your guestbook work?

I wish I knew. Unfortunately, I'm completely inept at the mysteries of CGI...
 

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